cabbitzilla

My warped sense of humor is, I'm told, 'legendary' in our family. So much so that every oddball joke and quip that anyone comes across gets forwarded to me in the off chance that I'll find it amusing and somehow be made quantifiable and 'understood'. Yeah, right.

But today, the elder of my two younger sisters forwarded me a joke that one of her daycare customers had sent her, and it actually got a giggle out of me. So I'll stick it here, and stick it to all of you, and you can either be amused or suck it up and take it like the subby you know you want to be.

Nyah. :)

Pecans in the Cemetary

On the outskirts of a small Georgia town, there was a big, old pecan tree just inside the cemetery fence. One day, two boys filled up a bucketful of nuts and sat down by the tree, out of sight, and began dividing the nuts. "One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me," said one boy. Meanwhile, several dropped and rolled down toward the fence.

Another boy came riding along the road on his bicycle. As he passed, he thought he heard voices from inside the cemetery. He slowed down to investigate. Sure enough, he heard, "One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me." He just knew what it was. He jumped back on his bike and rode off. Just around the bend he met an old man with a cane, hobbling along.

"Come here quick," said the boy, "you won't believe what I heard! Satan and the Lord are down at the cemetery dividing up the souls." The man said, "Beat it kid, can't you see it's hard for me to walk." When the boy insisted though, the man hobbled to the cemetery.

Standing by the fence they heard, "One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me..." The old man whispered, "Boy, you've been tellin' the truth. Let's see if we can see the Lord." Shaking with fear, they peered through the fence, yet were still unable to see anything.

The old man and the boy gripped the wrought iron bars of the fence tighter and tighter as they tried to get a glimpse of the Lord. At last they heard, "One for you, one for me. That's all. Now let's go get those nuts by the fence and we'll be done."

They say the old man made it back to town a full 5 minutes ahead of the boy on the bike...