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Dec. 25th, 2004 08:51 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
cabbitzillaAnd I'm back at my temporary home again, and the cats are fed.
Yesterday was spent with mom, grandma, the older of my two younger sisters, and her husband and kids. The last post hit the hilights of that visit. All told, it lasted maybe three and a half hours.
Today was the gathering at my mom (Evelyn is my stepmom, but I think of her as mom. anyway...) and dad's place just south of Baltimore. It's one of the few holidays that Ev's siblings and attached spouses and children all turn out. Anyone looking in a window would immediately recognize a mostly blue collar crowd, yes, but the appeal is strong. You won't find 'political correctness' here... but you'll find some of the most fundamentally -honest- people I've ever met. They work hard, they play hard, and they shoot from the hip. Rough edges abound, but there's a freedom and joy not to be found elsewhere. Some of the highlights?
All told? I spent seven fairly content hours in and around the normal Christmas mayhem; when it became obvious that my marriage was dead, I got asked if I was gay. My answer of 'You mean I've got to choose a side?' got guffaws. They're not threatened by my oddness... they just know I can take it just as well as I can dish it out, which makes me one of the family. These folk are good people. They know who they are, and are content to not tell other folk how to live just as long as THEY don't get told how to live. Rough, raw, and rowdy, every last one of them has a code of honor, blunt as it may be, that hits in the same ballpark as my own.
It makes me wonder why my mother's side of the family has such a pole shoved up their arses, so busy meddling in everyone else's lives that their own are dull and lifeless. Megan's father's family is cut from the same mold, which is why the trips up to New Jersey are often so ... difficult for me. Her mom's side of the family, while an income bracket above my dad's side and stepmom's sibs, are as practical and honest as the group I just left. And this year... I don't know how Megan's mom managed it, and I'm scared to death to ask her for fear it'll screw things up, but this year the Christmas gathering with Megan's family is being held in Virginia... with her mom's family, and only her father present from his side. I can't even BEGIN to say how pleased I am.
It... has truly been a lovely Christmas. For the first year in... well, in forever, I'm actually -happy-. I really am hoping it's a sign of things shifting gears to a future that's not intent on crushing me under the wheels of progress. Thank you, God. If ever I could have asked for -proof-, I've gotten it. Proof that I'm going to make it. The road won't be cherry blossoms and rose petals... but the recharge over the last few days has renewed my sense of purpose.
Changes are coming. I'm looking forward to at least -some- of them. It's my hope that my friends and family scattered across the globe have as lovely a holiday as I've had. I love you all. *smooch*
Yesterday was spent with mom, grandma, the older of my two younger sisters, and her husband and kids. The last post hit the hilights of that visit. All told, it lasted maybe three and a half hours.
Today was the gathering at my mom (Evelyn is my stepmom, but I think of her as mom. anyway...) and dad's place just south of Baltimore. It's one of the few holidays that Ev's siblings and attached spouses and children all turn out. Anyone looking in a window would immediately recognize a mostly blue collar crowd, yes, but the appeal is strong. You won't find 'political correctness' here... but you'll find some of the most fundamentally -honest- people I've ever met. They work hard, they play hard, and they shoot from the hip. Rough edges abound, but there's a freedom and joy not to be found elsewhere. Some of the highlights?
- You know, if that damned Bush dude invited me and the missus to dinner, I'd have to find some poor queer to send in my place. At least THEY are honest about who they are.
- Q) So who do you think we'll go to war with next?
A) Those 700 Club loonies that wanna tell us 'n ours we ain't smart enough to know how to live. - (to me) Why'n the hell'd you let Megan drive? You know she can't drive OR park... (she'd managed to block half the parking off with her 'parking' job; I had to go fix it. Martin offered to 'fix' it with the winch on his pickup... which just made me walk faster to move it.)
- (to a mouthy eleven year old) It's ain't too late to bury you. Your mom's been wanting a new baby, so making a replacement'd be no problem...
All told? I spent seven fairly content hours in and around the normal Christmas mayhem; when it became obvious that my marriage was dead, I got asked if I was gay. My answer of 'You mean I've got to choose a side?' got guffaws. They're not threatened by my oddness... they just know I can take it just as well as I can dish it out, which makes me one of the family. These folk are good people. They know who they are, and are content to not tell other folk how to live just as long as THEY don't get told how to live. Rough, raw, and rowdy, every last one of them has a code of honor, blunt as it may be, that hits in the same ballpark as my own.
It makes me wonder why my mother's side of the family has such a pole shoved up their arses, so busy meddling in everyone else's lives that their own are dull and lifeless. Megan's father's family is cut from the same mold, which is why the trips up to New Jersey are often so ... difficult for me. Her mom's side of the family, while an income bracket above my dad's side and stepmom's sibs, are as practical and honest as the group I just left. And this year... I don't know how Megan's mom managed it, and I'm scared to death to ask her for fear it'll screw things up, but this year the Christmas gathering with Megan's family is being held in Virginia... with her mom's family, and only her father present from his side. I can't even BEGIN to say how pleased I am.
It... has truly been a lovely Christmas. For the first year in... well, in forever, I'm actually -happy-. I really am hoping it's a sign of things shifting gears to a future that's not intent on crushing me under the wheels of progress. Thank you, God. If ever I could have asked for -proof-, I've gotten it. Proof that I'm going to make it. The road won't be cherry blossoms and rose petals... but the recharge over the last few days has renewed my sense of purpose.
Changes are coming. I'm looking forward to at least -some- of them. It's my hope that my friends and family scattered across the globe have as lovely a holiday as I've had. I love you all. *smooch*
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I am glad you had a lovely holiday...
Date: 2004-12-27 03:22 am (UTC)