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Nov. 1st, 2005 01:10 pm...
Last night's confrontation netted me a bit of cash... and absolutely nothing else was accomplished. After three hours of trying to explain why I was so upset, getting nothing but blank stares from Megan, I gave up. I just don't have the energy reserves to pour into what is essentially a social black hole. Her attitude softened a bit, but it was simply because I was obviously and visibly upset; there was no comprehension or understanding.
Which means I'll get a day or two of 'kinder, gentler Megan', and then she'll revert to what passes for normal.
If it were malice, the strength to take her down would be there. It becomes much more complicated when it's -not- malice. There's no evil there, really... just complete headfscked oblivousness to anything that doesn't directly impact her. And while the personalities vary wildly, all three of her sisters are the same way. The only way to 'win' is to leave, and that's a lot more complicated than some of my kin out there understand. Everything rides on a single hope, and if it collapses on me then I'm well and truly shafted ad infinitum.
Mel managed to talk me down out of hysteria last night (bless you, sis), so I'm in a bit better shape today than last night. Still not fabulous, but at least marginally functional. Both of my therapy appointments got cancelled today; I'm too fragged for the physical, and the last time I saw my brain care specialist in this kind of frame I nearly got committed. Not my cup of tea, thank you. I've got three days to put up with Megan, and then she's gone for a weekend reenactment event on Long Island. She gets dropped off Friday morn, and I'm free until late Sunday night.
Here's to freedom, even if it's temporary.
Last night's confrontation netted me a bit of cash... and absolutely nothing else was accomplished. After three hours of trying to explain why I was so upset, getting nothing but blank stares from Megan, I gave up. I just don't have the energy reserves to pour into what is essentially a social black hole. Her attitude softened a bit, but it was simply because I was obviously and visibly upset; there was no comprehension or understanding.
Which means I'll get a day or two of 'kinder, gentler Megan', and then she'll revert to what passes for normal.
If it were malice, the strength to take her down would be there. It becomes much more complicated when it's -not- malice. There's no evil there, really... just complete headfscked oblivousness to anything that doesn't directly impact her. And while the personalities vary wildly, all three of her sisters are the same way. The only way to 'win' is to leave, and that's a lot more complicated than some of my kin out there understand. Everything rides on a single hope, and if it collapses on me then I'm well and truly shafted ad infinitum.
Mel managed to talk me down out of hysteria last night (bless you, sis), so I'm in a bit better shape today than last night. Still not fabulous, but at least marginally functional. Both of my therapy appointments got cancelled today; I'm too fragged for the physical, and the last time I saw my brain care specialist in this kind of frame I nearly got committed. Not my cup of tea, thank you. I've got three days to put up with Megan, and then she's gone for a weekend reenactment event on Long Island. She gets dropped off Friday morn, and I'm free until late Sunday night.
Here's to freedom, even if it's temporary.
