(no subject)

[cabbitzilla]

Here I am the invisible man
A lost fallen angel helping mankind where I can
My memories are there to save your world
For you I'm just the invisible man

Tired fails to have a meaning when it's the -best- state you ever reach.
Not bitching about things does no good.
Bitching about things does no good.
Silence frightens my loved ones.
Non-stop rants are even more meaningless than 'tired' in the above example.

I simply don't have anything of value to put here, besides a thank you to the people who continually turn out to voice their support of me. Without the support of those folks, I simply would have vanished years ago. Someday I hope to be truly real, something more than pointless words on the screen that clash with the very visible reality. Someday I hope to make a step forward, and try and resume my life.

It won't happen until she's gone; regardless of her actual actions, it's enough of an open wound that I'm locked into place. That's the reality. I can hope, and I can dream, but until I can take a deep breath in a space I know is safe, with knowledge that it'll remain safe, I'm stagnant.

I want this to change. I lack the strength to make this change while I hemorrhage emotionally. Please be patient.