(no subject)

Today has been bad.

Bad enough that I never got dressed, and am still in my nightgown and slippers.

Why? I must have had a very restless night; sometime during the night the transdermal patch I wear for pain came off. With the added weight of the Desyrel, I kept sleeping... until the first stages of withdrawal woke me up, already in the sweats/chills/shakes stage. My brain didn't quite wake up, unfortunately, and it was several hours before I brushed against something with the 'current' shoulder and was -not- rewarded with the crinkle of plastic.

I've got a fresh one on now, and hopefully the chills/cramps/mental fog that it's gotten to will pass before I need to sleep; nightmares follow me into slumber when I try to sleep in this condition. I'm going to curl up into a ball here and try to keep myself amused with Inspector Parker and Sveerz!.

(no subject)

Today has been... bad.

Bad enough that I'm still in my nightgown and slippers, having voluntarilly passed by the opportunity to doll up.

Why? From time to time I have extremely restless nights, filled with tossing and turning and thrashing. An ex-partner used to say "You stood on your head in your sleep and spun, arms and legs thrashing, like something out of The Exorcist". Jamie always was a tad dramatic. Anyway, in the course of all the slumbering acrobatics, the transdermal patch I wear for pain came off... and with the added weight of the Desyrel (prescribed for me because I'd stopped sleeping altogether), I slept through it.

And woke up already into the withdrawal signs. Sweats, chills, and shakes. Unfortunately, my brain didn't wake up with me, and there was no cognitive recognition of withdrawal, only that I felt like I'd been hit by a high-speed MagLev train. A couple hours ago, I collided with a wall (I tripped over my own slippers and stepped on Hello Kitty's head, poor thing)... and noted that when I hit there was no crinkle of plastic from the shoulder where the patch should have been. And lo, there was no patch there. I blinked, and checked the other two spots I use, then stared stupidly at the wall trying to figure out why it wasn't there. And finally my brain woke up and yelled 'WITHDRAWAL' at me and started beating on pots and pans in my head. A new patch went on, and I checked my calender and noted that a new one was due late tonight -anyway-... but realized that it was going to be a long seven or so hours until I was feeling anything even remotely akin to 'human' again. That was about an hour ago.

The cramps, shakes, and visual phantoms are begining to abate, but the fever/chills and elevated pain levels are going to take longer. In the meantime, I'm going to curl up here and keep myself busy with Inspector Parker and Sveerz (both offer free downloads, just search the web for 'em).

Bleah.