cabbitzilla (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
cabbitzilla) wrote2000-12-14 03:46 pm
cabbitzilla) wrote2000-12-14 03:46 pm
Thursday, December 14, 2000
Exhale. Bad day. Back and hips are on fire. Four tries to get out of the waterbed. Maybe I should ditch it for a conventional matress. Hrm. Can't do too many changes until Megan's squared away. Wobbled to the bathroom, then into the computer room and collapsed in my chair. Rummage around and take today's fist full of pills. So many bottles. Peek out the window, since snow had be predicted. It's wet outside, but no snow. Goddess, why does it have to be so cold?
Kicked Dragonfire out of idle mode, popped the gateway over, poked at my mail. Letter from Snowy.. poor love sounds so lonely. Maybe once Megan's settled and happy, I can drag her over. I don't think she'd spazz about sharing a room, and it'd be nice to have someone here that genuinely understands.
Logged through B5, spent some time over on Legacy Born... I really wish more people were on during the day... I'm not worth much come evening time. Well, maybe I can
*blink*
*sigh* Went to sleep again. No clue what I was going to do. I... wish it didn't just hit me like that. If it gave me some warning, then maybe I could cope. I miss driving... I miss my job. And now I'm crying again. Too many changes, way too fas
Dammit. Way too fast. No wonder I get clobbered in Quake... I can't stay awake to save my sorry life.
Well, 's not all bad, at least. The slashes on my face are nearly healed, which will mean I can shave and do my makeup again. *soft smile* Funny how that just seems to cheer me up. Maybe I'll work on my nails today... that'd be fun. They need to be shaped again anyway. Eventually, I'm going to need to be presentable, to meet my Darling... chills... *smile* He's such a wonderful man, so kind and gentle and loving. And I've surrendered my heart to this man, sight unseen... and I don't worry about it, truthfully. I know that he's my One, I just need to hold things together until I'm fixed, and then everything will be perfect. Hrrm. Someone wants the phone. I don't know if that'll squick this or not so I'll submit now. 3:45pm Eastern
Kicked Dragonfire out of idle mode, popped the gateway over, poked at my mail. Letter from Snowy.. poor love sounds so lonely. Maybe once Megan's settled and happy, I can drag her over. I don't think she'd spazz about sharing a room, and it'd be nice to have someone here that genuinely understands.
Logged through B5, spent some time over on Legacy Born... I really wish more people were on during the day... I'm not worth much come evening time. Well, maybe I can
*blink*
*sigh* Went to sleep again. No clue what I was going to do. I... wish it didn't just hit me like that. If it gave me some warning, then maybe I could cope. I miss driving... I miss my job. And now I'm crying again. Too many changes, way too fas
Dammit. Way too fast. No wonder I get clobbered in Quake... I can't stay awake to save my sorry life.
Well, 's not all bad, at least. The slashes on my face are nearly healed, which will mean I can shave and do my makeup again. *soft smile* Funny how that just seems to cheer me up. Maybe I'll work on my nails today... that'd be fun. They need to be shaped again anyway. Eventually, I'm going to need to be presentable, to meet my Darling... chills... *smile* He's such a wonderful man, so kind and gentle and loving. And I've surrendered my heart to this man, sight unseen... and I don't worry about it, truthfully. I know that he's my One, I just need to hold things together until I'm fixed, and then everything will be perfect. Hrrm. Someone wants the phone. I don't know if that'll squick this or not so I'll submit now. 3:45pm Eastern